Rental Romeo update (reader discretion advised)

I guess the competition for sleaziest roommate ad is an ongoing one, and we have a new champion. Indeed, this fellow sets the bar so high (as in low), I doubt he'll be beaten in our lifetimes. He certainly blows the old champ out of the stadium.

So here it is, under the title, "OPEN MINDED PETITE FEMALE WANTED FOR FWB/RWB":

Here's this teenage girl with the same DNA as you and all I can do is think of how much she looked like you when you were 18. And that just about makes me cry. And then it turns out Vicky's really into the whole anal thing, that gets me to thinking about how many times I pressured you about trying it ...

It gets worse from there — apparently he's creating santorum with his ex-girlfriend's little sister, yet still makes a plea to get back with his ex. Then he actually gets to his roommate ad for his 3 br/2.5 ba place:

Hello LADIES of Sin City..are you an OUTCALL ONLY service provider OR an open minded,petite spinner,do you have problems with your credit so your housing options are limited,do you live in one of those run down,drug infested daily/weeklys ... Rent is Neg.upon services provided around the home.....I am for real,please be also....

Why is all this in the same ad? Who the hell knows? You've got to work really, really hard to mangle a Craigslist post this badly. Best of luck to you, dude.

Now, it took me long enough, but I figured out "friend with benefits" and "roommate with benefits." But what the hell's a "spinner"?

(P.S. Want to read the whole ad? Of course you do. Here.)